Evilnessness Rocks.
It’s the best thing that has ever happened to my life. I’m not evil as in I’m a Satanist! I shall slaughter the dogs! Drink their blood! And do a Bat Head-Biting a al Ozzy Osbourne!” uhm… no. Evil as in Mean. And not any Mean. Mean as in causing people, mainly adults, to cry and run to their mothers wanting a breast-feeding. THAT MEAN.
Some of my friends know that I’m mean. Some don’t. The ones who know I’m mean, sometimes fight back (like Jackie, for instance, she can have a cat-fight on queue), and sometimes they just ignore me and let me do whatever I want to them. And their responses are great, some fake-cry in front of me and act all strong but then end up curled up like a fetus in the corner of the bathroom, sucking their thumbs. Others just laugh and say my meanness gets better with age like a fine wine.
Now, the ones who don’t know about my meanness think that I’m just a bitch. Period. That’s IT. I’m a nice person, and my mean thing just comes out when I’m around friends and I can’t help it! Really! So when a strange person sees and hears the way I treat friends, they just assume that I’m a two-faced, four cheeked ass. Why? Because if there were a chance for me and that person to get to know each other, and I’m still in the “She’s Not A Friend Yet, So Don’t Be Playfully Mean To Her, Just Plain Nice Phase”, she’ll see my behaviour in front of her and remember the behaviour I had around my friends, she’ll think I was wishing to be mean to her too, but being polite for public decorum. Well, all I want to say is: YES, I DO WANT TO BE MEAN TO YOU! I JUST DON’T KNOW YOUR WEAK SPOT… YET!
Ok? Got that clear? Ok. Of course, many of you are now thinking, how can you be mean? give us an example, our dear blogger person, Her Royal Highness, Ms. Ego, SwAiR?

Well, one example is that when a friend wants to go and get something from her car or go someplace so she’d come back again… When she’d come back and say something like: “Did you miss me?” All I’d do is look at her coldly, just to burn into her and show her how cold my heart is, I’d simply say, in the coldest voice I have: “You were gone?”

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!! I’m so evil, I’m in love with myself.

And when a friend of mine needs a pen urgently for an exam, I just stare at her and let her melt there for a few hours before the exam, and then tell her I have one… and it’s broken. She’ll kill me, but she knows I meant it, and that my evilness urge had to be fed.

Another thing is that I have this goth-lovin’ friend named Abbi. She is a masochistic person. That means she loves it when somebody tortures her.
Now, who do you think does it? Me.
I call her fat, she laughs her head off. I give her mean stares, she smiles back and says: “oh forgive me, my tormenter!” which gives me an ego boost the size of a NASA Spaceship.

*sighs* Evilnessess is Coolness. No doubt about that.